I am sick of...
1.
Pictures of people and red cups, no one cares that you have 436 pictures of you working on future cirrhosis. The urban dictionary classifies "Red Cup" as meaning
"The Haribinger for consumption of alcohol in undergraduate colleges everywhere. The irony is that the original intention was to conceal the content of the cup, as the drinkers are all underage."
So, why don't you people buy different colored cups? or just drink the beer out of the fucking can.
2.
This one I can't post a picture of without purposely putting people in front of the train. Not trying to make enemies or make fun of a person(people) on the internet. But there is this new trend of taking photos, photoshopping them, and putting pointless shit on them. Text like "BESTFRIENDSFOREVER!" and "PARTYLIKEROCKSTARS!" I would like to seem a picture taken in 15 years where all of the people are in AA and the text says "15 YEARS LATER WE STILL KNOW HOW TO PARTY!!!!" Do you know what happens when you "party like a rockstar?"
Yeah that looks fucking glorious. Not to mention, the photoshopping jobs are HOOOORRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDD. They look like you taught your asshole how to use photoshop. With the stupid borders used and the ridiculous looking font. They look like christmas cards that you would send an alcoholic to force him to relapse. Its fucking retarded.
3.
On the topic of alcohol, I'm really sick of what I like to call "Before&After" shots. For those who are too fucking obtuse to know what I mean, here you go; Pictures of you when your sober, then one beer in, then two, then three, etc. I swear I don't know how many fucking pictures I've seen where I have guessed how many beers said person has had. For example I'm going to use my friend, who I don't give a fuck about making fun of. He's the one in the red hat, the little kid. Robby Rosano.
sadly, this is him sober.
One beer down.
2 beers down. don't mind andy's drunk-ness,
he probably had 100 beers at this point
Ugh, 3 beers down.
............4
Bedtime at 11:30, and this is probably after 4 1/3
because heaven knows he can't drink 5 without dying.
Luckily after this picture was taken, this happened...
post script; if you are over 115 pounds and get drunk off 4 beers, you shouldn't be allowed near alcohol. ever.
ANYWAY, my point is, we don't need a timeline of your night. I don't care if you had 4 beers or 14 beers, I just don't need a picture by picture retelling of your night.
4.
I swear to fucking god if I see another comment on how many games you won on Friday I'm going to lose all fucking hope in mankind. What are you going to go fucking pro for Beer Pong? I don't think I have heard of the MLBP, but I might be wrong at the rate the world is going to the shitter.
I don't see the fucking point of beer pong, it seems that every dull, unimaginative, half excuse for a person plays this retarded ass game. Isn't the point of drinking to....uh, I don't know....drink?! Why would you play a game that prevents that? I could sit here and think of 100 better drinking games that I just made up. Fucking play DRUNKTWISTER! everytime you fuck up you have to drink a beer, AND you play with girls and get your face in obscene places. Sounds a shit load better then throwing a ball into a cup.
If I was Milton Bradley I would fucking start selling drinking board games, like Margarita Monopoly or instead of Candyland you have Cervezaland. Anything is better than beer pong.
OR
I don't know, maybe all you ADD ridden children should sit the fuck down and drink a fucking beer for fuck sake. But then I guess thats why they are called GAMES, BECAUSE THEY ARE FOR FUCKING CHILDREN.
5.
This site is the epitome of self indulgent wieners. With the option too completely fabricate a persona, make yourself seem "pretty", make yourself seem "popular", pretty much too make yourself feel better about you. They give you the option too add thousands upon thousands of pictures, jesus christ. I fucking remember when they changed the myspace alotted photos from 12 too 16 and I thought to myself "What self loving asshole needs 16 pictures of themselves?" WELL shame on me, cause NOW we have an INFINITE amount of FUCKING ROOM.
NOW Facebook has allowed people to document the most miniscule of events and put them on the internet, FUCKING AWESOME! OH LOOK 36 PICTURES OF YOU AND YOUR FRIEND SITTING ON THE FUCKING BUS!!!! thanks facebook. People have WHOLE SECTIONS of pictures of them doing STANDING IN A DRIVE WAY! WTF!?!?
Why have I seen people's name under a picture, I look for them on the picture, I can't see them, and I notice a shoe in the left corner, and it happens to be their shoe......Do you really want people to know thats your foot? Do you want to people to notice how strikingly gorgeous your foot is? There is no need for you too add that picture you your already overloaded archive of moronic pictures. In twenty years when you have 100,000 pictures on facebook and your going through it with your children are you going to stumble on that picture of your foot and say "HEY KIDS, SEE, A PICTURE OF YOUR DADS FOOT!"
5 1/2...kinda
Now I love Macs, I have owned a mac for close to 15 years now. But around 2 years ago when they started making the new Macbooks, with the intel processors, they added a cute little program. Little did I know this program is actually the spawn of The Devil and James Leverne Turbeville. Its called......Photobooth..........this new program has caused me more distress then the presidential elections. I can't count how many fucking pictures I've seen off of Photobooth. Having some is completely fine, but when that number starts to reach 10,000,000 it gets a little ridiculous. I can't stand it, SO MANY FUCKING PHOTOBOOTH PICTURES. I bet Facebook has designated servers to host ALL THESE FUCKING PICTURES.
But the single thing that has cause me too lose sleep and have night terrors is photobooths "FUNNY!" little options. You know, the ones that morph your face into distorted images. Some of the pictures I have seen are so fucking heinous that it scares me. Why would pretty people want pictures of themselves looking fucking retarded? But when already fucking heinous creatures play with photobooth it becomes a problem that threatens national security. No wonder the world hates America, we ruin everything.
Alright its been way too long so I am going to bed.